Lesson 7: Building Self Confidence

Raising The Bar

Low self-confidence often has its beginning in early childhood. How you feel about yourself is very much influenced by what others say about you.

And in the child’s mind these remarks take root and you continue to act out this evaluation of yourself through life, unless you do something to change it.It is amazing to me how many very successful people in business and on the stage have serious self-esteem issues.

What they have done is worked hard to overcome the imbalance they were conditioned with. So despite their howling success in business or in the professional or entertainment field, they still have a poor self image that just won’t go away.

Of course many do overcome it, at least it doesn’t show. When you are first born you are virtually all subconscious mind and highly programmable. You have no defense against negative statements made about you, and they tend to stick tenaciously.

This is the root of the problem. In hypnosis these early events of consequence are called “the initial sensitizing event.” Most hypnotists try to find those events in order to effect a cure of the subject’s complaint.

They try to get to them with hypnosis or a similar method and bring a different understanding to the client. Simply unearthing them and bringing them to light for reevaluations is often all that is required to effect a substantial change in the person’s function and outlook.

What Does Self Confidence Look Like?


Easy to identify, yet probably difficult to define, conceptualize, and measure what does self-confidence mean?

One of the main requirements to success, happiness and reaching your goals is confidence. Having enormous self-confidence will also be useful in just about every part of your life.

You were born with self-confidence, that is, self-confidence is something innate. Self confidence can be taught, nurtured and built over the years, at any stage in life.

Confidence is the personal ownership of no one; the person who has it either kept it from birth or they learn it at a point in their life.

Your degree of confidence is truly the outcome of how you perceive yourself – which is eventually how people will perceive you. How people interrelate and respond to you is a reflection of how you perceive yourself.

Therefore if you don’t have a high degree of self-confidence or a huge deal of self-esteem then its mostly because you are concentrating on your negative traits and on what you are doing wrong.

In other words, you are being your own worst enemy! The good thing is that you can alter this and improve your self-confidence. The most talented person on earth has to build confidence in his talents from the foundation of faith and knowledge, like anybody else.

The device will be different from one person to the other, but the necessary job is similar. Confidence and attitude are accessible to all of us according to our skills and requirements not somebody elses as long as we make use of our talents and develop them.

Self-confidence is an approach which lets individuals have positive yet reasonable viewpoints of themselves and their conditions.

Self-confident people trust their own skills and abilities, have a general sense of influence in their lives, and believe that, within reason, they will be able to do what they desire, plan, and anticipate.

Having self-confidence does not necessarily mean that people will be able to do everything. Self-confident people do have expectations and standards that are realistic and reasonable.

Even if some of their standards are not met, they remain to be positive and to accept themselves. People who are not self-confident rely extremely on the consent of other people in order to feel good about themselves.

They have a tendency to prevent taking risks because they are afraid to fail. They usually do not expect themselves to succeed. They often place themselves down and tend to disregard or overlook remarks and praises paid to them.

On the other hand, self-confident people are willing to risk the disapproval of others because they normally believe in their own skills and abilities. They tend to accept themselves; they don’t feel they have to conform in order for them to be accepted.

Self-confidence is not essentially a general trait or characteristic which permeates all aspects of a persons life.

Usually, people will have some aspects of their lives where they think they are quite confident, for instance, academics and sports, while at the same time they do not feel confident at all in other fields, for example, personal appearance, social relationships, among strangers or large crowds.

Releasing the habit of low self confidence is one of the keys to getting back to who you really are. Before the illustriousness of happiness can really show up in your life once again, there will be a clearing.

Use the following exercise to clear away the outdated image of you so the real you can shine a new. Your time has come to do what you deep down knew all along. You are capable, you are able. 

Action: Grab a mirror to look into or stand in front of one. Then repeat these words to build your level of Self Confidence to a healthier state.

Clearing statement: I am grateful for the person I am today. I appreciate who I am and I am supportive of myself. I can do anything I desire to do when I trust my impulses. I validate my own personal strength right now. All is well. I love myself.